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Managing a difficult spouse in a divorce

Some people in Texas may be going through a divorce with a toxic spouse. As difficult as this may be, there are steps they can take to try to manage the situation more effectively.

Financial paperwork should be gathered as soon as possible. A person who anticipates a high-conflict separation might want to do this before talking to the spouse about the divorce. Tax records, bank statements, information on retirement accounts and more may all be useful if a spouse tries to hide assets. One might also want to run a credit report to get information on accounts that are in both names.

When children are involved, a difficult spouse may try to drag them into the divorce and use them as weapons. Parents should resist conflict and avoid arguments the other parent tries to start in front of the children. Custody exchanges should happen in public places, and a parent may want to bring someone along for support. Keeping a day-to-day parenting journal might be a good idea in case allegations of abuse arise. In general, people should try to get things in writing. Communication can be limited to emails and texts. If necessary, all communication can pass through attorneys. If one spouse persistently harasses and stalks the other, a restraining order may be necessary.

In high-conflict divorces such as these, litigation may be necessary for property division, child support and custody. A parent who is concerned about custody because of issues such as abuse, addiction or the possibility of abduction could discuss these concerns with an attorney. It may help to collect evidence such as police reports. If the child's well-being is not endangered, it is usually considered best for the child to spend time with both parents.

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